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Try and The Devil - A Showcase Experience

nicoledaniella7

It is not even Halloween and I have already had four different costumes. Four! Back in the June as part of a work situation, I decided to dress up as Bo Peep. The pictures continue to haunt me months later as they are consistently used during work presentations. I also recently used Halloween as an excuse to wear a dress I bought in May 2023 and used it to dress up as a loofah (that one was fun and I managed to add some rope that I got on Amazon). The other two costumes, well those were part of the recent pole showcase that I took place in.


Backstory, back in 2021 I decided to take part in the studio's showcase by participating in not one but two routines. Both were group routines but one was pole and the other was lyra (hoop). This was a big mistake. Big! Huge! You see, group routines require coordinated practice time and you need energy. Energy you probably won't have when for your relatively new job, you are handling 10 hotels and during budget season. I can fully admit now that I should have recognized this early and stepped away, instead I was a curmudgeon that was difficult to work with. I am not kidding. I believe it was a week before the showcase after another terrible practice (because of my attitude) that the owner said "Nicole, you don't have to do this." But mama ain't raise no quitter and I wanted to stick it out. I did and by showcase I was somewhat fine and did somewhat of a good job. After it was over, I thought my showcase days were over as I was never again asked to participate and I couldn't see myself paying to show the lack of skill and talent I have.

Fast forward to 2024 which as you may know, I have been doing a lot of pole this year. Like a lot! When I heard that showcase was happening, something in me said "Coco, you should showcase your skills! You've worked hard, you should do it!" And I was like, yeah I should! And my friends were like, yeah you should and we will make signs (this was also said while drinking wine sooo perhaps we should a bit on the alcohol) so I signed up for a solo not even knowing the song I was going to dance to. That very Saturday after signing up, this song called Try by Dizzy Fae which I had never heard in my life came on Spotify. That was my song! It was upbeat, sassy, with a slight cowboy vibe which helped to pick out my costume. It was meant to be! Or not.


I have been taking a lot of pole heels classes as well and when my instructor asked who would be interested in participating in the group number, I swiftly raised my hand and paid my money. Had I ever heard this song by Banks called Devil? Nope! Was I entirely comfortable with the thought of dressing like a devil, nope! But did I decide to take four Saturdays and focus on this group routine, yep! At this point I have gone from saying I will never doing a showcase again to being in two routines. Goodness.

Quickly, I learned I bit more than I can chew. I could not focus in open to put together my solo routine. I decided I would just freestyle it to take the pressure off. I listened to the song incessantly and developed a concept of a plan but did not dance to the song fully through until dress rehearsal the day before the showcase. I did practice quite a bit for the group routine. There was a part in which we inverted and my biggest fear was that I would be the weakest link in the routine. I really wanted to nail that group routine.


Showcase came and I am still incredibly overwhelmed and thankful for the support that I received. My friends and family came deep and from far to see me. I think that is also why I am so disappointed in how my performances went. I opened the show and the regular inverts that I usually have no problem nailing, I could not get my ass up. My rehearsal went great but actual showcase, for me it fell short and knowing that my friends and family came and were not even seeing me do well, well it sucked. My best friend that has never come out came and he saw me suck. It is a terrible feeling. I didn't even take a bow after. Nope, I scurried off and tried to fix my mind for the group routine. The group routine went okay. Admittedly, we had some challenges just with getting all of us together and I think had we had one more rehearsal with all of us, it would have been stellar but all things considered it was fun and I loved that chair portion so much. In case you're wondering, I did invert but the struggle was real.

I am not sure I would do another showcase, or if I did, I wouldn't tell people so they could come out. I love and appreciate the support but for me I did feel like a failure and I can not shake that feeling.


The good news is I tried and I looked good while doing it :)

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success voltage
success voltage
10 nov 2024

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